It's funny By Sir Cess Poole "It's funny what makes you laugh, isn't?" Now is that what we call a truism, a cliché, or is it a joke? Well I, as your honorary knighted thespian, class it a joke. During my illustrious career my ears have held audience to many a ribald and bawdy story that could be classed by my esteemed personage as a joke. Some I class as social, some political, some near-the-knuckle and others that are damn right unprintable! Let's deal with the social and political. I start with one-liners. Did Adolph Hitler love Jews? Does Mahatma Ghandi burn? Is the Pope a Catholic? Is Mr. Eskom out today? Is the Rabbi Jewish? Answer in either the affirmative or negative as the mood and truth takes you. Oops! Have I gone too near the knuckle? Let's move on to stories. Of course you all know that Neil Armstrong was the first man to land on the moon. But just suppose that when he took that mighty leap for mankind he espied through his helmet a lone figure sitting on a rock on the edge of the Sea of Tranquillity. Over he bounced. "Hey man! Who the hell are you?" asked a deeply irate Mr. Armstrong. The solitary figure dressed in a safari suit, a comb in his sock and smoking a Lexington replied, "I's Van de Merwe!" "And what the hell are you doing here?" enquired Neil as he glanced at the fifty wheelbarrows, two hundred pick axes, and one hundred shovels that surrounded Van. "I's doing f..k nothing till my boys arrive!" Oops we've gone political and nearly unprintable. But still, "It's funny what makes you laugh, isn't it?"

It's funny what makes you laugh, isn't? That’s what I call a truism. Or is it a joke? To me, as your honorary knighted thespian, it’s a joke. (During my distinguished career) My ears have held audience to many a ribald story that my esteemed personage has classed as a joke. Social, political, some near-the-knuckle and others that are damn right unprintable! I start with one-liners. Does Mahatma Ghandi burn? Is the Pope a Catholic? Is Mr. Eskom out today? Is the Rabbi Jewish? Answer affirmatively or as the power outage dictates. Oops! Too near-the-knuckle? An undisputed fact - Neil Armstrong was the first man to land on the moon. Suppose that when he took that mighty leap for mankind he espied through his helmet a lone figure sitting on a rock on the edge of the Sea of Tranquillity. Over he bounced. "Hey man! Who the hell are you?" asked the irate Mr. Armstrong. The figure dressed in a safari suit, comb in his sock, smoking a Lexington replied, "I's Van der Merwe!" "And what the hell are you doing here?" enquired Neil as he glanced at the fifty wheelbarrows, two hundred pick axes, and one hundred shovels surrounding Van. "I's doing f..k nothing till my boys arrive!" Oops! Political and nearly unprintable. "It”s funny what makes you laugh, isn't it?" (222)

It's funny what makes you laugh, isn't? Is that a truism, or is it a joke? I, as your honorary knighted thespian, call it a joke. My ears have held audience to many a ribald story that my esteemed personage has classed as a joke, social, political, near-the-knuckle and others damn right unprintable! Starting with one-liners. Does Mahatma Ghandi burn? Is the Pope a Catholic? Is Mr. Eskom out today? Is the Rabbi Jewish? Answer affirmatively or as the power outage dictates. Too near-the-knuckle? An undisputed fact - Neil Armstrong was the first man to land on the moon. Suppose that when he took that mighty leap for mankind he espied through his helmet a lone figure sitting on a rock on the edge of the Sea of Tranquillity. Over he bounced. "Hey man! Who the hell are you?" asked the irate Mr. Armstrong. The figure dressed in a safari suit, comb in his sock, smoking a Lexington replied, "I's Van der Merwe!" Glancing at the fifty wheelbarrows, two hundred pick axes, and one hundred shovels surrounding Van, Neil enquired, "What the hell are you doing here?" "I's doing f..k nothing till my boys arrive!" Political and nearly unprintable. "It"s funny what makes you laugh, isn't it?" (200)

Ron Smerczak

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Name	Comment	Date
Erna	Hahaha. Those were the days… You wrote the above in response to my call for a competition entry, so I am posting it as that – but you need to get rid of 77 words to be eligible to win. Isn’t that funny? As a proud Afrikaner, I need to point out that the correct spelling of Vannemerwe is Van deR Merwe. If you use my suggestion for the phonetic expression of the gentleman’s accent, you can excise two words right there! Points: 5	2008-02-01
James	A great illustration of what is funny to some and not to others. I'm in favour of anything that breaks down the self-censorship of political correctness. Points 3 - Very promising piece of writing	2008-02-02
Ron	Thanks for making me work on cutting it. A brilliant exercise, it's like trimming ones toe nails. Now down to 222. A double Nelson in cricket parlance. I’m going to try and keep my feet of the ground till after the final adjudication. And my title is seven words, so for sake of argument we can call it 216. And as the traffic authority’s cameras do give a 5 to 9 ks/hr leniency allowance, we can safely deduct another 7 making it 207. These remaining 7 points can be removed as we are in Africa where numeracy and literacy are struggling to find their global number one place in the thinking of the National Department of Education. We can also take out my four italic and bracketed words, should you wish to diminish Sir Cess’s over-inflated ego. You may post this postscript as an addendum. It’s only 156 words, so you can call it my “bonus minus-points” award, making the whole submission only 66 words! (156) The title of the above PS should be “It’s funny what makes you think, too!”
Erna	Title does not count, anyway. So, without the title, you’re down to 215, whatever you wish to say about it (and that’s usually not little). You still have to cut 15 words. I promise you won’t bleed. I am itching to do it for you…	2008-02-03
Louis	Erna, both you and Ron are funny. (LOL) Ron, I didn't enjoy the first attempt and the second attempt is the better version, to me. You can still edit some words out of the piece and garner a rollicking tale. Personally, I thought van der Merwe jokes were passé - still, the second attempt comes close to promising and perhaps one further edit might do the trick. Points 3 - Very promising piece of writing	2008-02-04
Ron	Here ya go 3rd lucky. Ms word count exactly 200.	2008-02-06
Erna	YAY!!! Points 5 Perfect – Pithy! Still sounds like Sir Cess, but it’s honed to the bone.	2008-02-07
James	Real class Points 4 - Pretty close to perfect. I was captivated	2008-02-17